I will first say that I am not the kind to want to go and hike one afternoon. So when I told my friends that I was going on a canoe trip they were alittle worried about me. There is this place in Waynesboro, Tennessee where you can rent canoes and kayaks that's called "Crazy Horse Canoe Rental" and the river is Buffalo Rock. If you have never been-you must experience this adventure at least one time in your life.
So to start with-just so everyone knows that I have been canoeing before but it has just been yyyyeeeeaaaarrrsssss. I just thought that we would go to some random place and put in and float along for a few hours but little did I know what I was getting myself into. We pull into the Crazy Horse Canoe rental parking lot and I see old school buses and people with no or little clothing on. The people that I am with have done this before and alittle more regularly then me. They have dry bags, the foot shoes that fit like a glove, sandwiches, etc(you get the point). We go up to were you pay and get all your equipment and I get a chance to people watch for a few minutes and kinda take it all in. I will give you a description of some of the people that I watched: several VERY large girls in camo and pink skimmy two pieces, lots of red/white/blue Budlight bathing suits, people without teeth, and your average hippies. Now I am not one to judge but like I stated before this was not at all what I was expecting.
We go in this building where you pay and half of it is a store. While my friend is paying for the day, I go over and look in the "store". They have like to shelves of food but all the interesting gadgets that would help you during your trip was what I was more excited about. They had coozies that went around your neck, so you were still able to paddle (of course I am a proud owner ). Plastic cases that would hold your cigs and lighter. A case for your camera and batteries. And the list goes on and on.
So we go and get our life jackets and canoe (we have four canoes so kinda a big group) and the other three canoes get the coolers since we have three people in our canoe. So we are off.... down Buffalo Rock. We are getting in about 10:00 am and we are also doing the ten mile track. We start the day off with a cold one in my new coozie of course and start off by making friends with these two redneck men. They were alot of fun..maybe alittle too much. hehe! Then up behind us comes a man and his wife----not sure that after the trip they will still be married---oh wait we saw them alittle while later and they were laid up in the canoe making out hard core. I saw alot of this--not the making out part. Fighting. Before you get married, you need to go on a canoe trip with the future hubby. That will be the true test along with a few other essential fights.
We continue down the road and come upond a cliff where people are jumping off. Three of the guys that were with us jumped off. I didn't want to die from being careless and the fact that I am scared of heights I didn't think that it was a good idea. The two guys that we made friends come up and start talking to us. You know they love women---and ones with boobs. We were not lacking in that department. To quote on the guys that was with us to one of the girls that was with us: " Don't make me cuss out your boobs..Well it will take me to long". So one of the girls that I was with challenges one of them to shot gunning challenge. That would be a beer shot gunning challege. Well ...these guys clearly have not missed any beers along the way--So whatever game on. She lost the first time but the second time she had it in the bag! She was the CHAMP!!!
Well...this is where the funny stories come in...you already know that I said that rednecks are all that I see..I think that I met the two biggest two (Sorry ML and Jennie if you are reading this). Now you kinda have to follow this: The friends that we made..we will call them Boy A and Boy B started talking to Boy C and Boy D which in turn started to talking to me and ML. Come to find out Boy C is related to Boy D which is related to Jennie but she does claim the person (hahaha). So they then start telling us that we need to come out tomorrow and canoe with them. I am not sure how many teeth they had. Boy D kept telling me how pretty I was and how he wanted me to come out with them tomorrow. No I don't know you and I am not going to get on a boat with someone that I don't know. Well...maybe sometimes. Just not today! So I just kinda wonder off and ML wonders behind me a few minutes later. We leave this cliff and continue on down the river. The sandwiches start coming out along with the crazy pictures start filling up the camera card.
We were not allowed to say the "F" word (flip or fall) and we did really good the whole trip expect at the very end. We almost flipped once but we stopped ourselves. Well the first time, it was kinda of my fault. Well....all my fault. One of the guys thought it would be funny to see someone flip so I started rocking us back in forth since I was sitting in the middle. I just rocked alittle to much--sorry guys---and you guessed we flipped. So now the challenge is to flip it back over and in case you didn't know that a canoe is kinda hard to turn over. Its very hard really. So after we gather everything that was floating in the water, we get it flipped over. So now we have to get back in it which is a challenge in itself. We go to get in the canoe and the two girls that are sitting in the front and back both got in at the same time which is a big no no so we flipped again. So here we go again gathering all of our things and the people that we are with think its sooooooo funny, which is was.
We finally get back in the canoe ...THANK GOODNESS!! So we continue done the river and we see the police. They are in the river pulling people over for their "behavior" which you would not know that they were there because they have a make shift fort up. They hide behind it and pop out and run to the river and get you. Just an FYI. I have never been so happy to see land and the school bus that would take us to the car. I have had a blast with my CofC friends and new friends. Memories were made and I want to go again. If you ever have the chance..please go. There are more stories that I am sure I have forgotten but this is a great blog about my trip!! Sorry sooo late
--MLW
